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Favorite bit? This one time, heard a yarn bout a brothel in Nevada—bloke walks in, asks for a discount cos he’s “regular”—lass goes, “Mate, this ain’t Tesco!” Laughed me head off, proper belly-acher! Surprised me too—thought they’d be all moody, but nah, they got banter! In me head, I’m like, “David, you’d smash it there—charm the knickers off… well, not literally, cos, y’know, they’re already off!”

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yelling. Turns out, her dog, a tiny fluffball named Puszek, decided to take a swim. I mean, come on, it’s a dog! But she’s acting like it’s the end of the world. “My baby! My baby!” she screams. I’m thinking, lady, it’s a dog, not a Titanic survivor. I had to jump in and rescue Puszek. He was just paddling around like he owned the place.

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