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About Ponce

So, check this—erotic-massage ain’t just kneadin’ knots. It’s, like, ancient! Goes back to them fancy Greeks, rubbin’ each other up for “health.” Yeah, right, health—wink, wink! Got me laughin’ so hard I nearly choked on my beer. What’s cool tho, it’s all bout energy—chi or whatever. Little known fact: some dude in China, centuries ago, wrote it boosts your “life force.” D’oh! Sign me up, I’m half-dead from Marge’s naggin’!

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I plopped down on the sand, trying to relax. But then, this kid next to me started blasting reggaeton. I mean, I love reggaeton, but not at full volume while I’m trying to chill! I was ready to throw sand at him. But instead, I just danced a little. Gotta embrace the chaos, right?

Suspected DUI driver leads deputies on chase, prompts San Juan County elementary lockdown